Culture No. 4

Friday mornings are quite significant in the Carlton Household. For this one and blessed morning only, we dip into the dry recesses of our “Eating Out” budget and hit up what is quite possibly our favorite restaurant ever. Oh, yes. You are correct. Friday morning is the day we go to Dunks. (And yes, the inventor of the chocolate frinkle TOTALLY qualifies as a restaurant. Don’t give me any of that “fast food joint” nonsense.)

Drew has gone to Dunkin Donuts on Friday mornings since before the beginning of time. I’ll admit: I was tempted to go all “Budget Enforcer” on him until I realized one debilitating, Kryptonical fact: Northeastern Pennsylvania is haven to the elusive Dunkin Donuts sugared raised donut.

Most likely you have never heard of this creation because, sadly, it was admitted to the “Endangered Donut List” sometime in late 2007. (Ridiculously, the French Crueler is also on this list. Dang you proponents of the Freedom Fry/Toast! You obviously did not think through all the consequences of your Franco phobia.)

I first discovered the sugared raised donut at the Williamstown, Mass. Dunks in mid-2007, from where it promptly disappeared the day after I was officially addicted. (Life is cruel.) Mama and Sister V. also sighted this rare beast in Connecticut around the same time, but, tragically, it too vanished. As of today, the New England habitat of this delicious concoction has been completely wiped out. (The Boston Crème is quite the heavy weight. The more delicate donuts have a hard time competing.)

But then I moved to NEPA and my world became a better place. (I bet this blog is the only place on the interwebs containing that sentence.) Because yes, it’s true, not only does the sugared raised donut still exist in this bastion of heritage pastries, but it is thriving! Here, you can go to Dunks as late as 7:15 a.m. and they still have six left! (In Billsville, you were out of luck after 7.) It brings hope and happiness to my heart knowing there are still holdouts against the advent of good donut flavor destruction. (You may also be happy to know that America does INDEED run on Dunkin, as evidenced by my multiple mile post-donut jog. The slogan is true!)

Happy Friday, kids. Go a little crazy. Eat an endangered donut just for me.